The colloquial Australian- and British-English phrase like a robber’s dog is used to denote:
– physical ugliness;
– temporary states such as tiredness, hangover, anger, etc.;
– rapidity.
—Cf. also the Australian-English phrases like a twisted sandshoe and like a beaten favourite.
The phrase like a robber’s dog occurs, for example, in Raise a glass to “Yes, God is a Digger”, by Mike Carlton, published in The Sydney Morning Herald (Sydney, New South Wales, Australia) of Saturday 2nd December 2000:
Sorry, but I rather like the Chivas Regal ad and its now famous pair of female legs. They are as long and alluring as a winter weekend in bed.
I don’t dribble in front of the billboards going “phwoaaar” a lot, but if the poster appears on a passing bus I happily admire it. And the cunning of the art director in leaving the model’s face to the imagination makes the shot the more intriguing. She may be all Gwyneth Paltrow dewy beauty or she may have a head like a robber’s dog; it’s the tease that amuses.
The earliest occurrences of the phrase like a robber’s dog that I have found are as follows, in chronological order:
1-: From an account of tournaments organised by the Picton District Tennis Association—account by ‘the Roundsman’, published in The Picton Post (Picton, New South Wales, Australia) of Thursday 21st November 1946:
I was a little annoyed at “Horrie” McInnes in his match with Athol Fergusson. Horrie has a head on him like a “robber’s dog” and was in all the trouble about the place, caused by playing shots over which he had no control. He favoured the drop shot too much.
2-: From GOLF Opening at Wongan Hills, by ‘Colonel Bogey’, published in the Wongan Ballidu Budget (Wongan Hills, Western Australia, Australia) of Friday 16th May 1947:
The handicap was won by Mr. Bandy and “Mrs.” Hooper by a narrow margin from Mr. Ainsworth and “Mrs.” Doc Lovegrove. Doc. demonstrated his versatility by almost winning the long drive with a bouncer shot that ran like a robber’s dog.
3-: From The Hard Way: The Story Behind ‘Power Without Glory’ (London: T. Werner Laurie, 1961), by the Australian author Frank Hardy (1917-1994)—as quoted in A Dictionary of Australian Colloquialisms (Sydney University Press in association with Oxford University Press Australia, 1990), by Gerald Alfred Wilkes (1927-2020):
“Have a look at him!” I advised the audience. “Have a good look at the head on him like a robber’s dog.”
4-: From Peter Spooner’s Week, published in The Sun-Herald (Sydney, New South Wales, Australia) of Sunday 27th April 1969:
PRETTY FACES FOR US
If you have a head like a robber’s dog, chaps, then do not seek work in Sydney as a male model.
The vogue here, I am told, is still for the clean-cut type, the boy next door look.
What may have given some of the not-so-pretty types heart and hope was a report from London last week that a male model agency called “Ugly” had become a thriving business.
[…]
But no such luck for Sydney’s uglies who aspire to become male models.
5-: From Passing the baby, by Phillip Adams, published in The Sydney Morning Herald (Sydney, New South Wales, Australia) of Saturday 24th January 1976:
The nurse, a pear-shaped young lady with (to borrow Arthur’s subsequent description) “a head like a robber’s dog,” read the name and ambled off.
6-: From Sing a song of sideshow alley to us, by Harry Robinson, published in The Sun-Herald (Sydney, New South Wales, Australia) of Sunday 19th October 1980—the following is about the Australian singer Robyn Archer (born 1948):
You’d never call her glamorous if you saw her in the street. Her reddish hair grows like a coarse mop, and she describes her head as “like a robber’s dog.”
7-: From Blind Freddy and the drover’s dog, by the Australian cartoonist and journalist Les Tanner (1927-2001), published in The Age (Melbourne, Victoria, Australia) of Saturday 5th February 1983:
Dogs really don’t make great satirical images for drawing although they turn up often enough in literature as the hounds of hell or the dogs of war and the occasional craven cur or impertinent pup. You can be as lean as a racing greyhound or have a head like a robber’s dog and everyone will have you categorised immediately, but does anyone really know what a robber’s dog looks like, has anyone ever done for the robber’s dog in drawing what Tenniel did for the Cheshire Cat? The answer is no.
8-: From the column Bookcase, compiled by Susan Nicholls, published in The Canberra Times (Canberra, Australian Capital Territory, Australia) of Wednesday 1st June 1983:
Multiple and various are the offerings from readers of this column of similes, metaphors and expressions of comparison.
[…]
There seems to be a fascination for similes to do with heads. More this week come from Mr Leon Henry, of Hackett: “A head on him/her/it like a robber’s dog” or “like a Belgian racing pig”, and “heads on them like mice”.
Another on heads is “a head like a chewed mintie” from Mr M. Pierce of Weston, and from D. Harris, of Ainslie, we have “rough as hessian drawers”, “busier than a one-armed fiddler with the itch”, and “swooped like a seagull on a hot chip at Manly”.
9-: From News diary, by Alan Atwood, published in The Age (Melbourne, Victoria, Australia) of Friday 25th November 1983:
Drawing on the local lingo
Sine, the French satirical cartoonist, sat in Slattery’s Cafe in King Street on Wednesday night and announced that he wanted to learn some colloquial Australian expressions. “Beauty bottler!” someone suggested. “Beauty bottlair?” Sine asked. Then he wrote it down in his little notebook.
“He’s got a head like a robber’s dog,” Les Tanner suggested proudly. Sine seemed delighted with that one. He was even more pleased with some suggestions that followed, pertaining to things like more dogs and bricks and dunny doors, and these also went into his little book, but modesty prevents us repeating them here.
10-: From the account of a football match between Chesham United and Oxford City, by Lyndon Berry, published in the Bucks Examiner (Chesham, Buckinghamshire, England) of Friday 31st August 1984:
Ryan […] scored the goal of the night, to put United in front.
This boy is incredibly fast in tight situations, a fact he proved with this picture book effort… City were breaking from defence to mount a raid, but there was a slight uncertainty as Wallcraft looked unsure where to put his pass.
Ryan was on him like a robber’s dog, and in one blurred movement controlled the bobbling ball to hit a right foot rocket shot from just over 20-yards out.
What a Goal!
11-: From Cricket diary, by Michael Henderson, published in The Guardian (London and Manchester, England) of Saturday 1st August 1987:
When is an illegal approach not an illegal approach? When counties tap up players through newspapers, of course. Duncan Fearnley, who may not rest until he has brought the entire England team to New Road, stuck a Durante-sized conk into Leicestershire’s affairs last weekend. If Phillip DeFreitas wasn’t happy, he seemed to suggest, Worcestershire would be delighted to have him in their second team.
Leicestershire manager Mike Turner turned on Fearnley like a robber’s dog issuing a prepared statement. “His press comments concerning DeFreitas emphasise again that cricket is now one step away from a soccer-style transfer system. In my view the comments are, indirectly, a breach of (registration) regulations and an illegal approach to the player.”
12-: From Sportsweek, by Len Capeling, published in the Daily Post (Liverpool, Merseyside, England) of Wednesday 11th January 1989:
Fanz go from bard to verse
My first encounter with a Fanzine, the allegedly authentic voice of the soccer underworld, came a couple of years ago when someone pointed out a piece called They Came From Outer Space.
It was, as I recall, a far from flattering portrait of the Liverpool team, pointing out in gory detail some of the facial peculiarities of their 1986 squad, with particular reference to John Wark, who was described as having a face like a robber’s dog.
It wasn’t the sort of thing you could show around the Anfield dressing rooms without having your own features rearranged, although Bruce Grobbelaar’s Christmas-time book did include two of his teammates in a specially-selected Team to Frighten the Children.
13-: From What a choice, by Paul Hince, published in the Manchester Evening News (Manchester, Greater Manchester, England) of Tuesday 2nd May 1989:
Kenneth Bates, the ever-so-slightly potty chairman of Chelsea Football Club, […] has decided to reward his Chelsea players for gaining promotion to the First Division by holding a lavish bash at the most exclusive restaurant in London—the House of Commons no less.
But there will be a distinct shortage of female company for his lads at the Westminster wing-ding. For Baron Bates has decreed that none of the wives of the Chelsea players will be allowed to attend the promotion party.
Bit of a ticklish problem for the Chelsea players, eh, lads? If they attend the “do,” they will come home to a wife with a face like a robber’s dog. If they stay away, they will incur the wrath of their piratical chairman.
14-: From A nightmare for Kennykins, by Paul Hince, published in the Manchester Evening News (Manchester, Greater Manchester, England) of Tuesday 13th September 1994:
My very best pal in soccer, Kenny Dalglish, had a face like a robber’s dog when he jumped out of his new Lada and came banging on the doors of Hince Mansions the other night.
[…] What a paddy he had on him. Have you tried to understand him when he’s calm? You should listen to him when he’s mad. Sounded like he’d been inhaling helium.
A different acceptation of the phrase a face like a robber’s dog was mentioned in Glossary for the 90s, by David Rowan, published in The Guardian (London and Manchester, England) of Saturday 8th November 1997:
Robber’s dog n. sl. The wife, or girlfriend, of a male criminal: as in phrases such as “She’s got a face like a robber’s dog chewing a wasp”. And no, we’re not making it up: it’s the subject of a correspondence in the Times and is, apparently, police slang for a facial expression that shows hostility or bitterness, often seen on the wives of robbers subject to police raids. And nothing to do with animals.
A New-Zealand phrase, off like a robber’s dog, meaning to depart speedily, was mentioned in the following from The Birmingham Post (Birmingham, West Midlands, England) of Monday 18th May 1998—unfortunately, this newspaper did not specify the references to the dictionary in question:
New Zealand’s ‘brummy’ jibe
Brummies had better beware how they converse with Kiwis, and hippies should watch out too.
A new dictionary of New Zealand English shows that some words are not quite what they seem.
To New Zealanders, brummy means not a native of Birmingham but something cheap and badly made.
Hippies are not long-haired types living in communes but very brief swimming trunks.
The dictionary also reveals such gems as: off like a robber’s dog—to depart speedily, fly cemetery—a pastry with a filling of currants and sultanas, and egg-shell blonde—a bald man.
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