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Originally and chiefly American English, the phrase bag of hammers, usually preceded by the indefinite article a, is used in particular of stupidity—as in dumb as a bag of hammers and variants.
This phrase occurs, for example, in the following from Ford dumps whisky over closure, published in The Hamilton Spectator (Hamilton, Ontario, Canada) of Wednesday 3rd September 2025 [page A8, column 1]—Douglas Ford (born 1964) is the Premier of Ontario, Canada:
Premier Doug Ford reacted angrily Tuesday to news of the closure of a plant that bottles Crown Royal, pouring out a bottle at a press conference and encouraging others to dump the whisky as well.
Spirits maker Diageo announced last week it will cease operations at its bottling facility in Amherstburg, Ont., early next year, as it shifts some bottling volume to the U.S, which will affect about 200 jobs.
[…] Ford had some choice words for them.
“I always say, smart people aren’t too smart, and you guys are about as dumb as a bag of hammers for doing this.”
It seems to me that the American-English phrase dumb as a bag of hammers can be compared to the Australian-English phrase silly as a wheel and to British-English phrases such as daft as a brush, daft as a wagon-horse and mazed as a broomstick: I think that, in those phrases, the underlying notion is that anything is dumb that does all the hard work.
However, the earliest occurrences of bag of hammers that I have found indicate that this phrase has had a variety of chiefly negative meanings—these early occurrences are as follows, in chronological order:
1-: From A Fast Life on the Modern Highway; Being a Glance into the Railroad World from a New Point of View (New York: Harper & Brothers, Publishers, 1874), by Joseph Taylor [chapter 4, page 78]—here, bag of hammers is used of a loud noise:
THE ENGINEER’S DIAGNOSIS.
An engineer once sent in the following diagnosis of the complaints of his engine, “Juno:”
“Deer Sir,—Her bilers want purgin bad she dont make her steam cheerful […] her valves are weezy she rattles like a bag of hammers […].
2-: From an account of a court case, published in The Philadelphia Inquirer (Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, USA) of Saturday 17th October 1874 [page 3, column 1]—here, the reference is probably to the lumpy, misshapen exterior of a canvas-bag filled with hammers:
During the course of the session a Mr. Lee, surnamed “Hop,” sauntered into the court room with his “Speeke muche English friend, Ah Tong.” They are Mongolians, with a decidedly brass-kettlish cast of countenance, and were enshrouded in linsey-woolsey robes, and the same, though they hung on their backs like a bag of hammers, set their person off to the best of advantage. Their feet were encased in the regular Chinese turn-uppers, and, what was more, their hair plaited and replaited into the most approved fashion of pigtails. What little remained was used to form what might be called a beautifully-designed bird-nest a la chignon.
3-: From Oh! Pease!, published in the Connecticut Western News (Canaan, Connecticut, USA) of Friday 30th November 1877 [page 2, column 4]—here, the reference seems to be to ignorance or stupidity:
George Pease came into this place Sunday as a professional tramp, and after being fed on milk and honey till the next (Monday) morning, proceeded directly to the lime kiln of Pierce, Lawrence & Co., and stole Patrick Doyle’s overcoat, for which little “irregularity” (that’s what they call it when bank presidents steal,) he was bound over by Squire Roraback to the superior court in Litchfield. He thought if some arrangement could be made so he could come out about the first of April, it would suit him pretty well. Squire Roraback ought to help him in this, “his last request” What if he dont [sic] know as much as a bag of hammers? He wants good comfortable quarters through the winter, and then come out in the spring in time to blossom, like any other Pease.
4-: From Local Correspondence. Woodford, published in the Deerfield Valley Times (Wilmington, Vermont, USA) of Friday 12th September 1890 [page 8, column 2]—here, bag of hammers is used of inanimateness:
Some witty brains begin to speak of reorganizing the lyceum which would be a good thing. While in other’s there’s no more life in that way than there is in a bag of hammers.
5-: From a letter to the Editor, on the dangers of bulk oil steamers, dated Bilbao, Tuesday 11th October 1892, by ‘Rhadamanthus’, published in The Nautical Magazine and Journal of the Royal Naval Reserve (London, England) of November 1892 [page 1032]—here, bag of hammers is used of a loud noise:
Cement will crack on shipboard, then in goes master petroleum, and as old father time rolls on, turns the rigid structure into a mass of working joints, and she jingles in a heavy sea-way like a bag of hammers.
6-: From a letter to the Editor, published in the Deseret Evening News (Salt Lake City, Utah, USA) of Friday 25th August 1893 [page 5, column 4]—here, the reference is probably to the lumpy, misshapen exterior of a canvas-bag filled with hammers:
His utterances have the cadency and rythmic [sic] modulation of a bivalvular molusk [sic]. His gestures reminding one of those of the Simian attendant of the strolling street musicians. His periods having that finished proportion and compactness suggestive of a string of Lannan’s sausage. His diction as symmetrical as a bag of hammers.
7-: From an account of the baseball match between Lancaster and Harrisburg that took place at Lancaster Base-Ball Park on Tuesday 14th August 1894, published in The Daily New Era (Lancaster, Pennsylvania, USA) of Wednesday 15th August 1894 [page 3, column 1]—here, the reference is unclear:
One of the visitors referred to a man who “ran like a bag-full of hammers.”
8-: From an account of the baseball match between Atlanta and Mobile that took place at Brisbine Park, Atlanta, on Tuesday 3rd May 1898, published in The Atlanta Constitution (Atlanta, Georgia, USA) of Wednesday 4th May 1898 [page 6, column 1]—here, the reference is unclear:
Ramp came up to the bat like a bag of hammers, and innocently struck out.
9-: From an account of a wrestling match between Jack McDonough, of Miles City, and Jack Curran, of Great Falls, that took place at the ball park, Miles City, published in the Daily Yellowstone Journal (Miles City, Montana, USA) of Friday 24th July 1903 [page 3, column 2]—here, the reference is to a heavy fall:
McDonough […] drove Curran to a corner and hit him a walloper in the side, then he got a scissor action on Curran’s head and made it revolve from both sides. Curran dropped like a bag of hammers and was dragged to his corner and it was about 15 minutes before he opened his eyes at all.
10-: From the New Castle News (New Castle, Pennsylvania, USA) of Friday 27th April 1906 [part 2, page 7, column 4]—here, the reference seems to be to turmoil:
KICKING AT NEWARK
Fans Are Afraid That Their Team Will Not Last Long in the O. & P. League.The people of Newark are kicking like a bag of hammers. The team is traveling a rocky road at the present time and what the outcome will be is hard to guess. Some think the team will not stick while others are of the opinion that better players should be secured. [&c.]
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