The phrase an iron hand in a velvet glove, and its variants, mean: inner ruthlessness and determination disguised in outward gentleness and courtesy.

Several of the texts containing the earliest occurrences that I have found of an iron hand in a velvet glove and variants indicate that this phrase is a loan translation from French une main de fer dans un gant de velours, and its variants—those earliest occurrences are as follows, in chronological order:

1-: From a review of Exposé comparatif de l’état financier, militaire, politique et moral de la France et des principales puissances de l’Europe (Paris: Le Normant, Delaunay, 1814), by Louis Pierre Édouard Bignon (1771-1841)—review published in the Appendix to The Monthly Review; Or Literary Journal, enlarged: From September to December, inclusive. M, DCCC, XV. With an Appendix (London: Sold by Becket and Porter, 1815):

No change […] was to be expected under the reign of Paul ¹; whose understanding, originally feeble, had become perverted by a long course of injudicious treatment. Like other men of coarse minds, he had no idea of governing but by force; and he was accustomed to say that the “Russians could be kept at their duty only by an iron hand covered by a velvet glove.” It is needless to add how soon he threw off this velvet, and exposed himself to the resentment of his court and subjects.

¹ Paul I (1754-1801), Czar of Russia from 1796 to 1801.

The above-quoted paragraph published in The Monthly Review in 1815 referred to the following passage from Exposé comparatif de l’état financier, militaire, politique et moral de la France et des principales puissances de l’Europe (Paris, 1814):

Il [i.e., Paul I] croyait, c’est son expression, que pour tenir les Russes dans le devoir, il fallait une main de fer couverte d’un gant de velours. Dans les premiers temps, sa rigueur tâcha en effet de se déguiser ; mais bientôt le gant de velours tomba, et la main de fer ne se cacha plus.
     translation:
He [i.e., Paul I] believed, it is his expression, that to hold the Russians to duty, an iron hand covered by a velvet glove was necessary. At first, his rigour did indeed try to disguise itself; but soon the velvet glove fell down, and the iron hand no longer hid itself.

2-: From High-Ways and By-Ways: Or, Tales of the Roadside; Picked up in the French Provinces, by a Walking Gentleman (London: Henry Colburn, 1825), by the Irish novelist, travel writer and diplomat Thomas Colley Grattan (1792-1864):

I feel almost inclined […] to dwell in this place, on the policy as well as the justice (which are perhaps synonymous terms) of this conduct on the part of Napoleon ², and the proof which it affords that, though ruling France with an iron hand, he knew so well how to cover it with a glove of velvet.

² Napoléon Bonaparte (1769-1821): military commander during the French Revolution (1789-99), leader of the French Republic as First Consul from 1799 to 1804, Emperor of the French as Napoléon I from 1804 to 1815.

3– : From Sketches of Parisian Society, Politics, & Literature, dated Paris, Friday 10^th February 1826, published in The New Monthly Magazine and Literary Journal (London, England) in 1826:

The grace of French manners is not incompatible with energy of character, if indeed we can be said to possess energy. A daring character in France, observed the Abbé Sieyes ³, is a hand of iron covered with a velvet glove. In other countries, and particularly in the North, a daring character is a hand of iron, the surface of which has been smoothed with a sharp file.

³ Emmanuel Joseph Sieyès (1748-1836), known as the Abbé Sieyès: Roman Catholic clergyman, influential political theorist during the French Revolution (1789-99); he later played a major role in organising the coup d’état that brought Napoléon Bonaparte to power in 1799.

4-: From The Spirit of the Times; Or Essence of the Periodicals (London, England) of Saturday 8^th April 1826:

Two of Napoleon’s Characteristic Sayings are recorded in the “Nouvelles Lettres Provenciales [sic],” lately published.—[…] II. “Il faut gouverner les hommes avec une main de fer couverte d’un gant de velours.”—Mankind must be governed with a hand of iron covered with a glove of velvet.

The above-quoted paragraph from The Spirit of the Times of 8^th April 1826 misquoted the following passage from Nouvelles lettres provinciales, ou Lettres écrites par un provincial à un de ses amis, sur les affaires du temps (Brussels: Grignon, H. Tarlier, 1825), by Pierre François Xavier Bourguignon d’Herbigny (1772-1846)—in this passage, dated Paris, August 1824, it is a royalist friend of the author’s who is speaking:

Nous appliquerons aux temps futurs l’expérience même de la révolution, et surtout cette maxime d’un roi qui devrait être sujet : Il faut gouverner les Français avec une main de fer, couverte d’un gant de velours.
     translation:
We will apply to the future times the very experience of the revolution, and above all this maxim of a king who should be a subject: The French must be governed with an iron hand, covered by a velvet glove.

 

ATTRIBUTION

 

The phrase an iron hand in a velvet glove has been attributed to various persons; for example:
– to Czar Paul I—cf., above, quotation 1;
– to the Abbé Sieyès—cf., above, quotation 3;
– to Napoléon Bonaparte—cf., above, quotation 4.

However, according to apparently reliable French authors, the phrase an iron hand in a velvet glove was first used by Jean-Baptiste Jules Bernadotte (1763-1844), French Revolutionary general and Marshal of France (1804), who was elected Crown Prince of Sweden (1810), becoming Regent and then King of Sweden and Norway (1818-44).

The following is from Mémoires de Constant, premier valet de l’Empereur, sur la vie privée de Napoléon, sa famille et sa cour (Paris: Ladvocat, 1830), by Constant Wairy (1778-1845):

On a dit qu’il faut gouverner les Français avec une main de fer et un gant de velours* ; nous avons senti la main de fer, Napoléon l’a appesantie sur nous de tout son poids, mais il ne nous a jamais montré le gant.
* Ce mot est attribué à Bernadotte.
     translation:
It has been said that the French must be governed with an iron hand and a velvet glove*; we have felt the iron hand, Napoléon has pressed it on us with all its weight, but he has never shown us the glove.
* This word is attributed to Bernadotte.

And, according to Mémoires du maréchal Marmont, duc de Raguse, de 1792 à 1841 (Paris: Perrotin, 1857), by Auguste de Marmont (1774-1852), Marshal of the Empire, Jean-Baptiste Jules Bernadotte declared the following in 1814 to Charles Philippe (1757-1836), Count of Artois, who was to reign as Charles X from 1824 to 1830:

Monseigneur, pour gouverner les Français, il faut une main d’acier, mais avec un gant de velours.
     translation:
Your Grace, to govern the French, you need an iron hand, but with a velvet glove.